Changes

Life has a way of being completely unexpected and crazy! It's been just over 4 months since I had surgery and it's amazing how much changes in such a short time. A week and a half ago I had my gallbladder taken out, it was quite painful but I'm recovering well and feeling a lot better. I've lost 84 pounds since surgery and that alone is very surreal to me. I'm at a weight I haven't been at in over 4 years. For the first time in over 5 years my blood pressure is NORMAL, I've never seen it this low which makes me AND my Dr. very happy. Since my blood pressure has lowered I'm noticing my headaches aren't as bad as they were. I deal with Chronic pain and get really bad headaches often and They've gotten a lot better as my health has improved. It's encouraging to be able to walk into a store and not have to search for the biggest clothes possible or to have to special order my clothes online. Before surgery my mobility and basic ability to simply care for myself was greatly limited. I can now stand when I take a shower and not feel like my legs are going to give out on me, I'm able to care for myself on a much better, healthier level and am more comfortable doing the simple things that most people don't think about that I've always had to think about and try so much harder to do. We went to the movie theater last week and I climbed to the top of the theater stairs and wasn't winded at all! I've been told that people can see it in my eyes that I'm so much more comfortable and healthy. I don't look like I'm in pain and completely miserable all the time. I've never been good at hiding how I feel so it's nice to know that I'm feeling better and it shows in my face. I have a lower back injury so walking, standing has been really hard for me for a very long time and as I got heavier it got worse. I'm thrilled to be able to stand longer, walk further, move easier than in almost 7 years. I think the biggest change is in my attitude and how I view life now. Instead of just surviving each day I actually look forward to what life has in store. It's changed my relationship with my husband in such a positive way as he's getting back the woman he fell in love with. The woman who is excited about life, happy, outgoing, and fun to be around. He's seen me with drawl from life and go into a shell and change from a social, fun person to someone who was miserable all the time, someone who avoided every social situation possible and who just wasn't happy with life. It makes my heart smile and makes me VERY happy to give my husband what he deserves. It's been a mental, emotional change as well as a physical change and it's great to have hope and to know that the life I've always dreamed about is becoming very much a reality for me. I look in the mirror now and I like the person that I see and I don't look away when I pass a mirror anymore. I know I have a long way to go, but I've come a long way in such a short time and to look at myself and see the transformation is amazing!
This is just the beginning of my journey and I'm so excited for what's next.

What's been going on

I haven't posted here in a while and I need to more often so I can share my progress with those in my life. Since my last post a lot has happened and a lot has changed. On March 26, 2010 I had Gastric Bypass surgery. It was a choice that took a lot of thinking, research, prayer, and strength! I am now 3 months out from surgery and can honestly say that this choice was the best choice for me. Since I was about 10 years old I've been overweight and I've spent my adult life continuing to gain. No matter what I did I continued to gain and it became not only frustrating but dangerous health wise. After hurting my back in 2003 and Being on medication that made losing VERY difficult I became worried that I would never be able to lose what I needed to in order to live the life I wanted. I used to think that if I had surgery to help me lose weight, I wasn't strong enough to do it any other way. Now that I've been through this process I know that's not true. It takes a really strong person to come to this choice, to admit that they need help in order to save their life. The changes since surgery are drastic and amazing. I'm no longer on high blood pressure medication, I'm able to stand longer, walk further, move better than I have in a VERY long time. Watching my clothes fit better and even get to big has been such an experience. I've lost 76 pounds and am at a weight I haven't been in almost 4 years! I fit better in chairs, I feel more confident and am starting to come out of my shell for the first time since before I hurt my back. The last few years I became very depressed and secluded myself from society for many reasons. I didn't leave the house but on a few occasions and I spent most of my time in pain and uncomfortable. I notice I smile at people more, I make eye contact and don't look down or away as much. I've had a few minor complications in the past three months, but it's nothing that I haven't been able to deal with. This is a learning experience and a complete life changing process. There are people who tend to think that Surgery is the "easy" way out and that couldn't be further from the truth! I've had to relearn my relationship with food, my body, my thinking and it's challenged me in every way possible. I meet with my surgeon this week for my 3 month follow up appointment as well as to address the issues I'm having with my gallbladder. This could and more than likely will result in another surgery to remove my gallbladder. Over all I don't regret my choice to have surgery and I know that my quality of life and my health will be better than they have been for many many years. I'm excited for what the future holds and for all the changes that are happening. I'm attaching a link to my update blog on obesityhelp.com so that those who read this can look at the progress and my thoughts in the last three months. If you click on the title of this post it will take you there, or you can copy and paste the following link.
http://www.obesityhelp.com/member/mandajolyn/